Timothy Joslyn

Our Family Reunion 2023 To start with for the last 10 years we have held our family reunion at Havana Glen outside Mountour Falls. For a lot of those years my sister has administrated the rental of the pavilion and the little things like plates, silverware, and table cloths. Now my sisters health is not that great but she still works as a babysitter just to pay her bills because she was cheated out of her retirement. So when she said that she was not going because she didn't feel good, my brother and I agreed to take my sisters place, in setting up the pavilion which was rented the year before. We were to give Crystal the paperwork and supply's and pass the hat around for next years rental. We arrived and no-one was there. So we waited. After about an hour our cousins the David Sampson of Pennsylvania and Tony, Crystals son arrived and where just as perplexed as us as to where everyone was. The reunion was supposed to start an hour ago and there was no-one here? After about ano...

To all of my family who disrespected me, my brother, and my sister by not attending our mom's funeral and not showing us the least bit of support. A funeral is not about the deceased. It is about the surviving family. The deceased is dead and nothing you do can hurt them anymore. So when you ignored my mothers funeral the only people that you hurt was my sister, brother and myself. My mother and father attended all of your mother an fathers funerals. I know because I'm the one who drove them and later pushed my father in his wheel chair. So I am very aware of how many times we made time to support and comfort you in your grief. We didn't have enough people to even have pallbearers. You claimed that you had important things to do. Yet you couldn't be bothered to even send flowers. She had four bouquets. I made one from our pink peonies. The other three where a poor reflection on your appreciation to the woman who was always there for your parents and to those three I giv...

My dad worked for my uncle John Leonard of Leonard's Truck line here in Watkins Glen on 2nd street. One day when my dad and uncle John were coning home after delivering freight. They were driving south on 14 and were just about where the Seneca Harbor Station is coming down that s curve that leads to town. Suddenly Uncle John shifts all the way down jolting my father into the windshield.  "What the hell!", dad yelled. Uncle John turned to dad with a funny look on his face. Then handed dad the steering wheel. A forty foot trailer doesn't stop on a dime. With no breaks and no steering wheel the truck was grinding its gears following the road. My dad looked up from the steering wheel and uncle John was already out the drivers side door. "Jump you idiot!" And dad did! Just as the truck was grinding its self into the sidewalk! There was a loud crunch as it hit the garbage dumpster at what was then a gas station. Luckily no-one was hurt and the truck grinding low ...

I Timothy Allen Joslyn being of sound mind and body do hereby make known my last will and testament to be followed upon my death. I leave all my worldly possessions to my Mother Jennie L Joslyn to do with as she sees fit. I wish to be buried at my cemetery lot in Burdett, NY next to my father; under no circumstances am I to be cremated as this is against my religious beliefs and an affront to god. I want a simple funeral and do not require a viewing as I believe few would attend anyway. I leave this option to my mother as it would only benefit her in her grief. I thank my mother and father for my life. I forgive all who have purposely or inadvertently hurt me either through malice or indifference and ask for their forgiveness. I have never hurt anyone through malice but have surely hurt some through callousness. I ask forgiveness from those who may have suffered from my mistakes. I have never set purposely out to hurt anyone. Signed this day March 18, 2020 Timothy Allen Joslyn Amended ...

So when did I know that mom was going to die? A few day's after dad died my mom had a ct scan of her abdomen because of diverticulitis. The scan showed a shadow in the upper right lobe of her lung. So after a month of scans and biopsies we started radiation treatment's at the oncology center at Robert Packer hospital in Sayre. Mom and I made her weekly visits into a routine were we would go to the hospital, then to the Chinese restaurant, and finally we would ride around the back hills of Sayre where mom grew up. We had 2 or 3 thousand dollars left from my dad's $35,000 settlement with the USMC for his PTSD after paying for his funeral, headstone, and buying mom new appliances for the house. The sad part is that we (as in the household because we shared everything we had) would have received an extra $3000 a month from the USMC for the rest of dad's life. We would have about $5000 a month coming in! All of mom and dad's dreams could come true! We could payoff the mo...

 I'm placing my mom's close in plastic bags so I can take them to Sue's so she and whoever can sort what they want out of them. Extremely emotional. She's gone and now people that didn't really care for her are going to have her clothes. More then likely they will just throw them away or drop them in the good will box. This is tearing my heart out and my one shoulder to cry on is gone. I drove down Halsey Valley road down to it's end and back. I talked to Mom and Dad all the way remembering mom's stories. I then went to Ithaca to our hide away, the Chinese restaurant, and had lunch so I could say goodbye. Unless a miracle happens, in a few months I will be living on the street's. Probably around October or November and I will not be traveling anymore. Tried my luck with a lottery ticket; epic fail. Going to go back to sorting soon. Miracle of miracles, I found the key to Dad's safe. The key's been missing for 8 years. Our first land contract has ...

  Three more sunrise before I have to let you go You held my hand when I learned to walk You lifted me up when I could not stand You were on my side when I could not fight Your love filled this world with a blinding light You are not gone they all will say There in my heart you will always stay I will miss you like the flower misses the sun I love you mom To the moon and back

I was employed at Disney and my mom bought me a used Fiat 1800 spider from the money we sold my truck for ($599 out of the $1000)! It was black with a red interior, had air conditioning, and a rear seat so small only a child or my mom sitting sideways because my dog claimed the front seat could fit. I replaced the dash with figured pine coated with polyurethane. I put a custom radio and mounted custom speakers in the doors and back panels. The picture is just like mine except I had a custom chrome bumper and luggage rack and an electric antenna. I would go to work with my radio blaring the Beatles! I loved my car. While I was at work my father twisted my mom's arm and hurt her. Junior Scott witnessed it and fled the state thinking he would be forced to testify against my father. My mother dropped the charges. The next day I was driving my Fiat Spider 1600 to work and as I was passing the park, next to lake Tohopekaliga in St. Cloud, some kids were next to the road. I slowed down fr...

I am asking for donations for my mom to pay for her funeral. We need $8265.00 No money will go to me this is a direct link to the funeral home. https://www.roycechedzoy.com/resources/make-a-payment   For the service of Jennie L Joslyn I will be retweeting this several times a day until my internet is shut off in about a month. Those of you that are upset by my begging may want to mute me for awhile. What would you do for your mom? The least I can do is sacrifice my pride and beg. Thank you for reading. I apologize if I upset you. If you can't help but know someone who can please pass this on.

Life is a boat I'm losing it. I ate two chilly dogs today. It just seemed to fuel my grief. I read a politicians election bid talking how the government needs to take care of the poor and fix snap!  I lost it. I vented at him. I said how my snap now that mom is gone is around $24.00 a month and how in 3o days the utility's are going to shut off then 60 day's later the bank will be forcing me out of my home for the last 30 years after 20 years of devoting my life to caring for my dad a disabled Korean war veteran and then my mother. I asked: Have you ever changed your mothers depends? Have you ever used a syringe to drip water into your dying mothers mouth hoping for just one more day? You politicians need to remember that I'm a person too! I'm sorry I was so abrupt. I went to mom's room and cried. I miss my mom and I don't think I'm going to survive this. How can I when my heart is gone?

  Tiffany or Princess Tiffany Anne Jocelyn is my support for the LGBT community on twitter and my own exploration of my sexual identity and what I think I would have looked like if born female (excuse the self pride please). My only real experience with sex is the violent attack from my Cousin Randy when I turned 7 years old and my Scout Master when I was in middle school. I am in fact a virgin when it comes to females. Mostly because of low self-esteem and other issues from being abused such as having your family warn off anyone that may be interested. So I had to ask myself "is the reason I'm alone because I'm gay?" Being very analytical by nature, I separated the issue into questions and started answering them. Was I gay? No I do not want to have sex with men as a man. The thought is disgusting to me. Do I find men attractive? No, in fact I find men to be universally unattractive, self centered, bullies, and louts. So not Gay. Was I Trans? Did I think I was a girl ...

  How can she be gone when I'm still here? I walk around the house looking for her when I know that she is gone. In my heart I am all alone. Before she left I could face the loneliness because I knew that my mom was there waiting for me. Who do I go to the chines restaurant with? How do I go for rides when my only friend is gone? Who can I talk to? Who will stand beside me when the family harasses me? When they humiliate me? When I'm all alone facing a mob that revels in my hurt? Why did you leave? I gave you my life. You were the only one I could trust with all my thoughts. I found your wind song. I remember how happy it used to make you when I would buy it. My heart is broken. I look for any sign of you. I remember the heart ache I felt when I was young and you and Dad would go someplace without me. But it is not as bad as this hurt because you are never coming home again. How do I talk to anyone else when I do not trust them? Where do I go now to find my friend?

As I have experienced my life, I have noticed that people are all echo's of others that have gone before. Each person personifies traits that can be amazing or horrendous depending upon your point of view. After much soul searching I think I know who I carry within my soul. I am Don Quixote. I tilt at windmills dreaming of Dragons. Without protecting someone else I wander aimlessly. I love unwisely and too deeply. I pretend to be someone else to protect who I really am. I am living "The Quest", that can never be completed. My ID is working overtime this morning.

Have you ever fallen in love? She wrapped her arms around my arm. I looked down upon an angelic face as she slept. We hit a bump in the road and she pushed her head further into my shoulder. Her hair smelled of flowers. I dared not move lest I wake this vision on my shoulder. Through the night I stayed watch over this gift from heaven till we arrived at our destination. She unwrapped herself from my arm smiling up at my face. And the sun rose as we looked in each other’s eyes. She took her boogie board from the storage compartment. “Thanks mister, I was really sleepy.” And she was gone. The bus moved on, Next stop home. Have you ever fallen in love? I have.  

So I was 10 years old and my family(?) were members of a CB club.  They would go all over central New York for conventions. It was mostly for the adults. The only nice thing for kids was a free toy raffle for kids 13 years and younger. You or your family would sign you up for either a boy's or girl's toy. Then you would have your name called and win a "cheap" toy. I was hopeful for basketball or maybe a football. So when my name was called I was really hopeful. Well that was short lived. To the joyfulness of the assembled members (around 100), the person running the raffle, held up my first toy that I had ever won! Well everyone assembled was laughing at the new doll that was "given" to me. I was humiliated and refused to leave my seat and collect it. So true to form, I was ordered, by my father, to go get it. After all he could give it to some deserving girl. Because after all I didn't deserve anything. Not even support from my family. So, I walked u...

It's raining outside. The rain is nothing compared to the pain I feel inside. My tears could flood the world as each day draws closer to my moms funeral. I'm doing my duty. I'm pulling my family back together. Some are feeling angry because I'm asking them to forgive. I've asked Peggy and Aunt Gail to behave themselves for just one day so my mom can have all of her family together without any drama. So they are going to stay on opposite sides of the funeral. It's not perfect yet it is a start. Now if I can only control my grief. Have you ever been happy? Have you watched a sun rise just because it was there? Have you smiled at children so engrossed in a game that they don’t even see you watching? Have you seen the red planet at night and thought; how did it get there? Have you seen two lovers kiss and wondered what is it like? Have you seen a baby hold your finger tight? Have you ever cried from a movie that you watched all alone? Have you ever been happy? I thi...

Jennie L Joslyn Age 87 of Watkins Glen, New York passed away June 10th 2023 exactly seven years after her Husband of 61 years Richard Joslyn. She is survived by her three children; Susan Reed, Richard Joslyn II, Timothy Joslyn and her sister Gail Wyre; Her grandchildren; Jennifer and Brian Mahuta, Jackie Joslyn and Justin and Morgan Reed; Her great grandchildren Bridget and James Mahuta. Jennie is survived by numerous nieces and nephews. The family will receive friends and family at Royce-Chedzoy Funeral Home, 212 E. 4th Street, Watkins Glen on Monday (June 19) from 1pm-2pm followed by a funeral service at 2:00pm with burial at Hector Union Cemetery. A reception will be announced after services. The family would like to express a special thanks to Peggy Freeman for your help.

So my Mom had a neglectful childhood with bad feelings towards her father Grandpa Enders. My Grandpa Enders shot his second wife and then killed himself. He died with a lot of unsolved issues with my mom. At night he appeared at mom's bed calling "Dimples, Dimples Please!". This went on for years until I was in my 20's. My mom spoke to doctors and they told her to talk to him but this didn't stop the visitations. One night I found my mom sitting on our porch all alone looking sad. So I asked her what was wrong and she told of Grandpas visitations. I asked why she never spoke of it before and she replied that she didn't want to scare us children. The official report say's that Grandpa and Grandma Alberta had been fighting and that he shot her in the stomach with his shotgun and then shot himself in the head. Alberta lived 5 minutes longer then Grandpa. They called it a murder suicide because he was drunk. You know the old drunken Indian excuse. It didn'...

My Mom never had her own bicycle. A little time after my Grandma and Grandpa Enders divorced my Mom, Aunt Ginger, and uncle Bob were asked to go to Grandpa’s home for Christmas with his new wife. Grandpa promised each of the children a new bike. They were still reluctant to go because his new wife favored her own three children over them. So when they arrived they didn’t really trust the situation until they saw the three new bikes next to the Christmas tree, the bikes that had been promised them.   So it was an unusual happy moment for them to see that their dad still cared for them. That is until his new wife handed them each a coloring book and a pack of crayons for their Christmas presents. She “convinced” their father that the bikes should go to her kids and that their new dad (Grandpa Westbrook) could buy them their own bikes. So my Mom never had her own bike.

It's been a complete day that you have been gone mom.  Family that talked to me on the phone: Gail, Tate, Peg Family that talked to me through Rick on the phone: Eileen, Darla Family that came to see me: Sue, Peggy Friends: 0 I have a plethora of friends and a mountain of family. I have been thrown away all of my life and here I am alone. 

Do our spirits remember us? Or do they forget so they can move on to a new reality? Are we ever truly reunited with our loved ones? Do spirits grieve like we do? Or is this the difference between us; We remember and they forget. I don't want to forget. I want my Mom and Dad back! I want us to have the life together that we have been cheated out of! I have no power to change anything and I can't forget. If I hold them in my heart and mind then they are not gone. If they are not gone then they are only someplace else. If they are someplace else then I can reach them. If I can reach them then we can be together again. I have to reach them. 

 In a few hours my mom will have left me for a whole day. I look at the grass, the trees, the sky, my eyes full of my world, and my heart is empty except for the pain of existence without you Mom. I see people walking down the sidewalks laughing. What right dose the world have to go on when my heart is broken? I gave everything to caring for my dad and mom. I asked for nothing and have received nothing from either my mom or dad. I have no income, no friends, very little family, and soon people that already have more then they need will take my home. Why is the world still here when I lost my whole world, my whole reason for waking up in the morning? My Mom left me exactly 13 years after my Dad died. What's it all about? I can't answer. But she is free now. I ate stuffed peppers all alone. I have been thrown away again. My plethora of friends hide the  mountain of family rushing to my comfort. Not. I wonder if it will be the loneliness or my soon to be hard life that will kill ...

My First Nike’s   About a year ago when my mom was in Sayre Hospital my cousin Peggy came to visit me at home. She had been “dumpster diving” in Elmira behind the mall. She opened up a big bag and presented me with my first Nike’s sneakers! They were used and a little dirty, black and white, and I loved them! You see I came from the 80’s era when you were judged by the labels on your clothes. My mom worked full time at the salt plant and with my father disabled by a broken back, we didn’t have much money to spare. So I learned to not ask for expensive things like designer jeans and Nike shoes (that cost $300) so that I wouldn’t make my mom and dad feel bad because they couldn’t afford them. So having a real pair for me is a big thing. I felt guilty because “dumpster diving” is not really legal. So I donated $300 of groceries over the next few months to a local sharing shed. Not because I’m that good of a person but because I really wanted to keep the sneakers. ...

 I feel so numb. I made the phone calls. I put her favorite jewelry on her. I laid out the clothes she was so proud of and put her hat on her. I feel my strength draining away. I need to finish my duty to her now and make sure her last instructions are followed. I need to give sue all of moms clothes so she can hand them out to the family and give what no-one wants to good will. I need to focus on her. I cant think right now. I just did the dishes. I don't know why. So many "I's". I laid down to take a nap and fell asleep. When I awoke my best friend, my strength, my mom was gone. Yesterday was the anniversary of my dad's death. I believe mom died at just before midnight. I had a strong feeling about midnight. As I held her hand and wet her mouth with a sponge, I became extremely tired, nodding back and forth falling to sleep. So I went out from the room and lay down on the couch. One of the first times that Chunk-a-lunka wasnt already there. I was only going to c...

 I was 10 years old when I joined. The scout master was a pedophile. He molested three of the guy's from my class at school. He tried to with me. I saved myself by quitting. That's all I want to remember today. He still owes me for a sleeping bag I never received from the scout store. He's a fucking creep. When we were learning CPR he tried to get us all to french kiss him because artificial Annie was broken and if we didn't he wouldn't certify our life saving certificates. I got my certificate. He all but had sex with Berry on the church floor where he was teaching mouth to mouth. He was always running his hands up and down my back. Really creep me out. Probably why I don't like to be touched by others. OK I can talk about the camping trip now for a little bit anyway. We went camping in the middle of winter at a park in Mountour falls. Ok I still can't write it all. He roofied me and I woke in our tent with no underwear or pajamas and a sore ass. ENOUGH ...

 After my mom had her implant removed she received an extension from the governor so that she could sue the manufacturers of her multiple failed implants. Well the wife of one of the manufacturers CEO's (Dow Corning) sued because the silicone nodules made it painful for her to smoke a cigarette. She received $25,000,000. So we hoped for at least a million. Page (one of the lawyers working for Ray Schulater) said that we had already won one of the suits for 5 million and that we were waiting for the judge to release the payment. Then of course the corporations paid off the government so they could declare bankruptcy and not have to pay for their crimes. So Schulater brow beat my mom into signing away her right to sue and to be placed in the bogus class action BS for 15 years. At least that was my opinion when it happened. More on this later. Mom and I would walk downtown to Montour falls for recreation (because we couldn't afford gas for the car). It's about five miles away ...

 So the politicians and their scientists are worried about children developing depression and anxiety from being forced to take school lessons via computers. We have a nut case with his finger on the nuclear button in Russia and we are worried because some kids had to social distance to save their life's. In fifth grade when every other little boy was drawing cars; I was drawing bomb shelters and trying to invent a positive airflow system so my mom wouldn't die from fallout. I used to sneak out of the house and walk the streets all night because I was afraid to sleep. I had my own copy of the geological survey map for central NY so I could calculate the safe altitude of a nuclear blast over the surrounding cities that would keep my home safe from the blast wave. 400' BTW. A large reason for me being so screwed up can be traced directly to the mammoth amount of anxiety I was under from my government and the rest of the nuclear crazy's out there. I couldn't get into s...

  Mom wanted chili for breakfast today. She used her walker to go to the bathroom with only minimal help from me. We sat out on the front porch for most of the morning listening to our willows whisper.  She wanted to know where I would travel to if I could. Or more likely she wants to know what I am going to do when she is gone and I have no-place to go. I told her that I would travel the world and see all the places we have talked about. I lied. I will probably end my days cold and lonely under a bridge someplace. I screwed up. Somehow I missed paying the garbage bill for the last three months(counting this month) and Cardinal will not let me pay online. So I guess I need to find a new garbageman. I know why. I've been on the run going back and forth to hospitals like a chicken with its head cut off and missed that confirmation button when I made the payments. Not really an excuse. But they haven't been that great of a service anyway. You can't count on what time t...

I watch the fog rolling down the valley. Like a cup leaking from the bottom, the mists seem to flow down the sides of my valley revealing those living there. One by one the houses appear. As I watch I lose myself in thought. My memories are like this fog. It starts with a small glimpse of an object. I concentrate on the unknown thing I see inside my memory. What is it? Slowly it gains definition. A shape: a spiral? I concentrate and it comes into focus: A spring? With this the flood gates open. I see the playground. I smell the grass. I feel the warmth on my skin. The sun is out. The sky is blue! I see kids playing. One by one I recognize the faces. I know them. What are their names? Then we’re laughing, the girls are screaming in pretend fear as we chase them! “MMmmm!” smacking my lips like I’m going to kiss her! Donna and Michelle duck under a picnic table! With my turtle I chase them! “My turtles gonna Kiss You!” Did they like me or was it my turtle? Well, my turtle was prett...

Dad Yes, it’s my fault again! Howard did the drugs; Howard put himself in the hospital! But it’s my fault! Gail calls me and I tell her she should tell the truth. My dad has mild dementia! He’s not stupid! If you lie, he will find out sooner or later. I will not lie to him! So, I say nothing to him about where mom has gone! My mom comes home and confirms Gail’s report. “Mom you shouldn’t lie.” I tell her. “If you lie, mark my words, somehow it will be your fault!” “I’ll give you to next week then I am going to tell dad the truth about Howard OD'ing on heroin.” I didn’t need to. Gail called dad and spilled the whole story the next morning! “Well, it wasn’t the first time” Dad said he knew of another O.D. too! Then they came down on Gail like a “ton” of bricks! Well of course! She should have lied! He was a Boy Scout leader! They want nothing to do with her! After all she did the right thing! But she knows too many secrets…too many skeletons from their closet! They have to use k...