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New Reality

 My mom is gone. I have a semi-child who can't dress herself or use the bathroom by herself. She seems to have all of her memories but her actions are foggy like dementia. I am ex-hosted. I am receiving no help from my brother or sister. I had to take mom to Rochester today and my brother didn't go with me. So you would think that he would at least clean the house, do the dishes (in our dishwasher), or finish mom's laundry. Nope. It's 10pm and I just finished putting my mom to bed and picking up the kitchen. If my family thinks that they can break me then let them try. I will be the only one left standing in the end and they will be known by their hatred. I took mom to see her sister Gail yesterday. Still a lot of fighting going on down there. I can't get involved with it or it will take away from the time I have left with my mom. On the bright side, Taylor dyed my mom's hair pink,purple, and blue. Mom really enjoyed it and she seemed to have a good time. Peggy ...

Looking better.

 Well they decided not to remove the blood clot. It seems that around 90% of it has dissolved and my mom is experiencing only moderate symptoms on her left side. Hopefully as the clot dissolves over time the symptoms will lessen. She is still about 200 miles away in intensive care.  So no phone to talk with her. Only nursing station reports. And then oly one other person besides myself is allowed to call. Have I missed something?  Covid is over isn't it? So when are they going to let up on the whole gestapo routine and go back to when people and places where not so mean and aggressive? It's like everything else. You give anal retentive people a little power and they think that they Stalin!  So I scraped up enough cash to fill the gas tank. That should give me two round trips. Hopefully she will improve more and can be transferred back to Schulyer or Elmira. 20 miles beats the heck out of 200! Now for the outrage. I waited all night lone for the hospital to call and g...

A day in the life.

 My mom just had a massive stroke. The hospital is transferring her to Rochester Strong memorial some 200 miles away. They hope to remove the blood clot on the right side of her brain. If it doesn't work she is either going to be a vegetable or die. As usual I am powerless to help. She is incoherent and I'm afraid that this is the last time I'm going to see my mom. When mom is gone I will have no-place to live, no money, no friends. I don't care about me. I never have or else I would have avenged myself against all the jerks that have hurt me. I'm just going to be so lonesome without her.
 So I'm working on my profile and I noticed a button to create a wish list. So according to this I can beg people for stuff when they read my blog? I'm not comfortable with that becasue my entire life people have only given me something because either: 1. They wanted to cheat me out of something else. 2. They just wanted to get rid of their garbage and not pay the garbage man. So if you want to give me a zillion dollars I won't bitch. I will cry and pay all my mom's bills, but I will not bitch about it! If however, like me you can't give anyone ten cents let alone a whole dollar. Then just be kind to people that are having a hard time. I know there are times when all I want is to not be mistreated and to have someone, anyone, to listen to me so I know that I am not completely alone in this life.

Preamble

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 This is my Bitch sheet. So expect Bitching. These are memories or fragments of memories. All are true and accurate to the best of my ability.  I don't want pity. I just need to share and I do not want anyone to feel like I'm asking them to take responsibility for what I write. It's my life. No matter how screwed up it is and I take full responsibility for it.